I feel like writing and I have no burning topic that needs discussion; alas, back to the mantra, "write what you know." I know about depression, diets, smoking, alcholism and being held hostage by your own manners. Oh, that last one sounds rather fun. So, here's the thing, I can't tell people, even when they are abysmmal and rude -- making lacivious comments in the workplace or obnoxiously chewing food in my face, to shove it. I WISH it were out of true acceptance of others and tolerance, but it's not. It's about fear of retaliation -- I don't want them to yell at me. It's taken me a long time to realize I really don't care if they don't like me.
When I have to stand up to people I involantary duck when they start to respond -- it's a built in defense mechanism.
Right now, I have three big areas of my life that are being compromised because I'd rather just hang out and pretend to be happy than address the situtations because somehow it feels like bad manners or worse yet, ungrateful.
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